Sunday, February 14, 2016

Love Ya!

In honor of Valentine's day, I thought I'd share a few thoughts on the verbal/written expressions of love. Ever since my nephew died, I vowed to let people know that I loved them (only if I actually do, because love is not something that I will lie about). One of my favorite quotes says, "Don't tell me you love me unless you mean it, because I might do something crazy, like believe it." There are very few things that are as hurtful and soul-ripping as having some express their love to you, only to later discover that they actually weren't sure of what they were saying or having not meant it.

Now, if you think that this post only applies to romantic relationships, you're wrong. This post pertains to all types of relationships; family, friends, romance, and whatever else you can think of. As I have shown my soul to the people around me, I have learned that there are different stages, or levels, of love. They can be determined by an 'I love you', a 'love you', and a 'love ya'. Although all are good when truthfully said, from my experience, they come across as having different depths of meaning.

The 'Love Ya'
This is a casual term of endearment. It is the 'I care about you', but not enough to use more syllables to express my feelings kind of love. It can also be interpreted as the last-minute-thought expression of love; a quick add-on to a statement. It is the level 1 in love stages. Not deeply felt in the soul at the moment, but still has some feeling (maybe it is skin deep?)

The 'Love You'
This is a more heart-felt statement. Instead of the 'ya', they are emphasizing that they do, in fact, love YOU as a person, not just that they note your existence with a 'ya'. The 'love you' is a more a deeply felt love, because they are acknowledging that it is specifically you that they love. They are acknowledging that you are a human being with a qualities that can appreciate. It is a more personalized expression, without the commitment of adding themselves into the situation with the 'I'.

The 'I Love You'
This is the big one. This is the heart and soul of love.The one that takes the relationship, whether it is platonic or romantic, to the next level, and the one that is least understood by a most people, in my opinion. The one that everyone seems to be afraid to say to someone else. Adding themselves into the expression of love means that they actually need to feel something for the other person and be vulnerable enough to say it out loud, running the risk of not having the other person feel the same way.  This is the 'I care about you, and I am willing to prove that I do, in fact, love you'. It is putting you and that other person in the same sentence. It is creating a promise and commitment to another human being that you see yourself with them in any form of a relationship. There is something about adding one simple letter to an expression that adds so much more depth and feeling to it. Emphasizing that 'I' love 'YOU'. I (who I am) loves YOU, just as you are.

Now that I have these defined as vaguely as possible, this doesn't mean that if someone says 'love ya', they don't actually love you in an 'I love you' sort of way, because this is obviously just my opinion (which isn't worth much). I shout 'love ya' to lots of people as we part ways, when I do love them at an 'I love you' level, but I use it as a quick add-on to a statement.

Because I have now made you self-conscious and have made you think twice on how to express your level of love to your friends/family/significant other for the rest of your live, I wish you the Happiest of Valentine's Days.

Love ya!!! (mostly because I don't actually know who is reading this right now...maybe we can take it to the next love level on another post.)

Saturday, February 13, 2016

Within

Within

Life is at times, a little bit rough
You gotta keep your chin up and play it tough
People are watching you; you can't let the know
That the demons within you are starting to show

Put on your mask to hide your fears
That disguise will camouflage all of your tears
Keep your chin up so they won't see
That your heart isn't beating' you are not free

The dark that's inside you is beginning to grow
But keep your mask on and they'll never know
Paint on that smile and a convincing eye flash
Just pretend you're okay, not turning to ash

Keep your mask on, and build up that wall
So your heart can't be broken or crushed from a fall
Suppress the shadows that try to creep out
Don't show them emotion or even your doubt

Pretend it is fine that you are alone
Brush off that hurt that you are unknown
Whisper a prayer as you lie in your bed
And hope that the demons don't answer instead

Hide the pain that seeps through your eyes
Put on your mask as you say your goodbyes
Don't show them your scars or the pain that runs deep
Put on your mask to hide the secrets you keep

Show them you're fine, prove that you'll breathe
Hide behind the disguise until the day that they leave
You can't let them see what lies under your skin
Even you can't run from the darkness you're in

Build up a facade to hide all the gloom
So all they will see is a flower in bloom
Tell them you're alright and keep your chin high
Be strong on the surface and reach for the sky

Your mask will protect you from all of the sting
It will guard you from the weight of the pain that they bring
But what if the facade weakens and you are left bare?
You demons are not something that you wish to share.

What if it slips and darkness exposed?
How will you keep yourself ever composed?
But what if it happens? What if they see
That you are not perfect, that you are not free?

Maybe they won't laugh, perhaps they might care
Maybe they've always noticed the demons in there
Maybe they've known, and can see how you've tried
And maybe, just maybe, they have their own demons inside.

3/29/2014